As I walk into the room, she is already there. Not that I expected any different; this /is/ her house. I cast her a glace as she gets up to greet me, it stops her in her tracks. As I collapse on the couch, she looks at me... a sort of desperation in her glance. A want... a need. Her brown eyes, that tan skin, beautiful, to the last touch. Yes... she was... is, beautiful to me. I look her up and down, as she sits down on the couch, at my feet, looking at me with those soulful eyes. A tear drops from my face, and I have to wonder if this is how I wanted it to end.

"I'm so sorry..."

I hold up a hand to silence her. Hearing her apologize hurts me more than anything else. If it hurt her so badly, if it hurt /me/ so badly, why did it happen so quickly? Why did it happen at all?...

"Don't be sorry to me. I cant feel it. Not anymore."

Another tear. It burns as it rolls down my cheek. I rub at my eyes; why am I crying? As I put my hands behind my head, she holds on to my leg, for support? For comfort? Pity?

"I didnt want it to end this way."

By this point, I can see the dams begin to break. Her eyes are beginning to water, her nose begins to run. The onset of something both beautiful and wonderful to behold. I set my head up on a pillow, my strength leaving me.

"How did you want it to end? I would have done anything, if you had told me sooner. I would have done anything, changed /anything./"

Thats it. I've done it. The tears begin to flow down her cheeks as her eyes close. Her hair begins to cover her face as she looks down at me. Tear drops stain my pants legs.

"There was nothing you could do... I /do/ still love you."

I close my eyes and the past 11 months flash by. The love, the hate, the problems, the good days, the bad days, the shit days. God, so much. For 11 months, for us to go through so much... The tears fall freely down my face, creating a small pool at the base of the couch.

"I wish I could believe that. I wish I could believe /you./ I just want things to go back to the way they were. When we were happy. Were you /ever/ happy?"

She begins to answer when the noise starts. That white noise. That horrible, horrible screech. I look around and my world begins to crash down around me. The walls fall off, the stove is ripped off its bolts, the television gets sucked away. Everything begins to leave me, leave us.

"No. No I wasnt."

I wake up in a cold sweat, again. As I sit up in bed, I check my cell. 0 Missed Calls. 0 New Messages. I bury my head in my hands and begin to weep. I'll never be able to face myself, years from now. I'll never feel the same. I'll never be able to love so completely. She took it all, when she left.

"I was."

My voice is quiet, broken, in the room. My cat growls, and my dog returns fire. My sob quiets both of them. I cry, and cry, and cry. The clock reads 3:06 AM. I get up, and move to the bathroom. In the mirror, I see someone who is not me. I see a man, his face broken with tears. Bags under his eyes. Hair missing, face bleeding, and knuckles cut.

"...I was."

I grip the sink as I get a drink. I wish it had been different. I wish I could change it. Change us. As I head back to bed, I begin to cry again. Things will never be the same. Things will never be as good. As I cry myself to sleep, I open my cell phone, and summon a picture of her. My tears cloud my vision, and I slowly cry myself to sleep, next to her again.